Friday 29 April 2011

He Cannae Cope

If Lallands Peat Worrier thinks this is good enough for a post-who am I to argue?

Anybody out there with with ideas for other verses feel free.

And to the kind seekers after knowledge: alas I am not the Tweeter known as LABOURSCOTLAND.

Though he did nick one of my headlines.

13 comments:

  1. 'Now Johnnie, be as good's your word;
    Come, let us discuss the SNP record;
    And dinna rin like a frichted bird,
    That's chased frae its nest i' the morning.'

    When Johnnie Cope he heard of this,
    He thought it wadna be amiss
    To gae to Asda for a piss,
    Then flee awa' i' the morning.

    ReplyDelete
  2. When Iain Grey he heard of this,
    He thought it wadna be amiss
    To hae a horse in readiness,
    To flee awa' i' the morning.

    oops.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I've voted once I've vote twice
    Scotland will keep voting
    till they get it right!

    and when they do
    on the anointed hour
    Iain Gray will be in power.

    May 5th vote Labour
    you know it makes sense

    ReplyDelete
  4. Was delighted to see it was ASDA in Ardrossan. The town I was dragged up in.

    And Niko, keep taking the tablets...

    ReplyDelete
  5. There he sat,
    All broken hearted,
    Paid 20p,
    And only farted.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks Richard.

    Niko, gie yersel a slap.

    Rab how've ye been?

    Demetrius, four bob for a fart?

    It used to be just a penny.

    And you could get thoughts too...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Seems I cannae cope with editing! Let's try again:

    'Now Iain Gray, be as good's your word;
    Come, let's discuss the SNP record;
    And dinna rin like a frichted bird,
    That's chased frae its nest i' the morning.'

    When Iain Gray he heard of this,
    He thought it wadna be amiss
    To gae to Asda for a piss,
    Then flee awa' i' the morning.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am being conservative, in Westminster at the Embankment now they are charging 50p although Charing Cross Station is still only 30. The flowers, however, are looking very nice this year in the Embankment Gardens.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Gray spent a penny in Asda,
    Then shat himsel' ere he'd got far,
    "Salmond's here?! Quick tae the car!"
    The assembled crowd were scorning.
    Iain Gray slumped quite forlorn,
    His face contorted, pained and thrawn,
    "Spin for me mendacious men!",
    A deceitful tale was forming.

    Hey Iain Gray are ye balkin' yet?
    At meetin' the non-Labour set?
    If you're no' talkin',
    We will wait,
    Tae gang tae the polls Thursday morning!

    "'Salmond ducked when Iain roared!'",
    We'll get that intae the Record,
    They're sic a blinkered Labour horde,
    That they'll print it in the mornin'"

    Alex Salmond heard o' this,
    He said tae us all,
    "Now what a load o' pish,
    There's a video o' that slippery fish,
    Wi' the Asda front door yawnin'"


    Hey Iain Gray are ye balkin' yet?
    At meetin' the non-Labour set?
    If you're no' talkin',
    We will wait,
    Tae gang tae the polls Thursday morning!

    Come now Iain, take it on the chin,
    Ye're campaign's in a tailspin,
    The two Eds soon will trade ye in,
    Despite yer slavish fawnin'.
    "Faith" quo Iain,
    "Though I get flegs,
    An' next time might hide oot in Gregg's,
    I'm the best o' Scottish Labour's dregs,
    Keir Hardie must be mourning."


    Hey Iain Gray are ye balkin' yet?
    At meetin' the non-Labour set?
    If you're no' talkin',
    We will wait,
    Tae gang tae the polls Thursday morning!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Iain Gray, Andy Kerr, Jacque Baillie - all ex-MSPs.

    Who is to lead zanuliebore now? King Kong? Couldn't do any worse than this crop of twits.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ur ye deid Conan, or just deid drunk?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Wiz a wee bitty fu last nicht fur sure :¬)

    ReplyDelete